Welcome to The Pit of Despair! Also known as my humble home! As you enter you’ll notice the insane number of naked baby dolls strewn about the room. You may have a hard time walking in a straight line due to various items that seem to have lost their way to their home: blankets; pillows; sleepy buddies; toys; clothing; shoes; backpacks; play purses; stuffed animals; and much more. That isn’t a new scent by Glade you note, oh no, that would be the pungent odor of dirty diapers, spit up, and who knows what else. As you walk through my dining room, you can’t help but be impressed by the mountains of clean laundry stacked up on the table. My kitchen features a glorious array of dirty dishes, as no one seems capable of starting the dishwasher when it’s full….nevermind actually getting to the unloading portion of that cycle! Oh and don’t forget the kitchen table complete with sticky residue from my toddler.
How does my home get like this? Seriously?!?!? It feels like I clean all evening after my toddler goes to bed and the next morning…..oh wait! I have a toddler! And a husband! And an infant! And I am sleep deprived due to not getting Baby Bear to sleep until 11pm and then waking up for an hour each night around 4am to change, feed and soothe said infant back to sleep! I have a family! We are messy! The question is, how do we stop the cycle of messiness? I’ve tried the Flylady system, and just can’t bring myself to follow thru with it. That and the emails get really, really annoying….Where are your shoes? If you can find ’em for me, I’ll put the darn things on! Shine your sink! Okay, once again, you find it for me and I’ll polish it!
Part of my problem is unrealistic expectations. My mom and I had a conversation about this the other day. I KNOW it’s not going to happen, but when I go to the store or leave the hubby at home I begin to fantasize. I dream of walking into my home with toys put away, dishes washed and put away, floors swept, mopped and vacuumed, clothes folded and taken to their appropriate rooms, the air lightly scented by a lit candle. Now, I KNOW this isn’t going to happen. But, I WANT it to happen. So, when I walk in the door and realize that my hubby and The Bear have decided to take a nap together on the floor of the living room, I don’t see the moment as touching. And, more importantly, I don’t see that while it’s not ALL clean, they did pick up some toys. Hubby did empty the diaper trend….he didn’t put in a new bag, but he at least emptied it. These should make me happy, but they don’t. My disappointment over things not being the way I fantasized tints my vision to the point I can’t appreciate what they did take care of.
One would think I would go out of my way to appreciate what he does try to do, since I so often feel unappreciated for what I do around the house. I’ll clean for more than an hour after everyone goes to bed, I’ll wake up in the morning expecting to be exalted as a wonderful wife and housekeeper. Only to have no one notice anything I did. This puts me into a bad mood. And worse I start the thought process of: well, if no one sees what I do around here, I’ll just stop doing it. That’ll teach ’em.
Except it doesn’t. My house gets messier and messier until my brain wants to explode and I demand a cleaning day. We stress over cleaning and vow to never let the house get that messy again. Until next week anyway!
So, you tell me….what works? How do you battle the clutter and the messes and life happening in your house? I’m always envious of people who make it look so effortless. How do I do that? Spill it, folks!